Pinnacles and Paradox
As I lay down beneath the moon anew, a sudden wave of knowing floods into my heart:
We are not the pinnacle of existence.
What would such a thing even mean?
How could we be at the top of a sphere
spinning in directionless space?
From that shattered view we call humility, we may perceive a wordless beauty hidden deep within our nature; may see the tragedy of our limits, juxtaposed against the clear background of that which allows for all things to be.
To be human is to be messy and filled with error. But what a beautiful, humble, and kind error it may be. Painstakingly wrought, our failures are what break us open to the perfection of things, just as they are.
For what good is a perfect perfection?
What use is rationality divorced from the heart?
If it has not love…
If it has not love…
No. Give me that imperfect perfection. Give me the perfection that comes amid my pain, in between the whips and cracks of lightning that life throws down.
That perfection that lives on in me as my breath, though every stormy wall tries to keep it from me, every ocean wave and every mountain try to crash down around me and impede my progress.
That perfection that lives on in me. As a fire. As a hope. As a defiant cry amidst the waning light.
Or perhaps that light is dawning. Perhaps the light lives on in me, as my fire, my hope, my own increasing light.
Give me that perfection that rises in my heart when this imperfect world has broken me open.
Do you know the faded memory of dawn that I speak of?
The one you only barely perceive with the eyes, but rather a concentrated warmth within your chest makes its tremulous unfolding clear and radiant.
It speaks of beauty, and then tells you all such beauty fades, then it reveals how even such a fading is beautiful;
such a pain is worthwhile.
Do not let that stop your crying out. Nor your fire, nor your hope. Nor your hands raising up toward the heavens, directionless in space as we freefall into dark, then light, and then rise up again to see that we are flying.
Remember, always remember:
If we have not love…
If wee have not love…
So have love.
Have love!
